#TMCAMTD – Swimming Hat

Me: …so you’ll need to make sure you  wear your swimming hat buddy.

Son: Okay.

(He looks at me and my wife. He is thinking. Obviously.)

Son: Is it a humungous giant hat? Like a Mr Wonka Hat daddy?

Me: Er, no, professional swimmers stopped wearing those a while back.

#TMCAMTD – A Bald Egg

Me: Oooh, I think I might have a BOILED egg for breakfast.

(Son looks at me very puzzled)

Me: What is it?

Son: Well you can’t eat a HAIRY egg Daddy. That would be disgusting.

Me:Wha…? HA! Very good…Bald, boiled…very good.

(Son looks very pleased with himself)

#TMCAMTD – Moo is the only Word a Cow can say

We had been discussing the special abilities of different animals…

Me: You’re a human being. Your special skill lies in how smart you are. You are smarter than all of the other animals in the world.

Son: Yes. Yes I am (He is very pleased with himself). Cows are not smart. ‘Moo’ is the only word they can say.

#TMCAMTD – An Ostrich Hiding From the Rain

Daughter: I will put my hands in my pocket today Daddy so if it rains my head will get wet but not my hands.

Me: Okay, fair enough. You don’t mind your head getting wet?

Daughter: No.

Me: Can you fit your head in your pocket as well? Like an Ostrich hiding from the rain under its wing?

Daughter: An Ostrich MUST hide its head under its wing Daddy; it has no umbrella.

Me: True.

#TMCAMTD – Bed Bug

Me: Night Night. Mind the bed bugs don’t bite.

Son: Daddy what do bed bugs look like? Can you draw one for me?

Me: Sure. (Draws Picture) This is what they DON’T look like if you go to sleep and what they DO look like when you try to stay awake. Good night, love you.

 

#TMCAMTD – Sad Dog Wearing the Funny Hat

My son pointed out a dog in the park wearing a flea collar.

Son: Why is that dog wearing that funny hat Daddy?

Me: It’s his sun hat. It gives him shade from the sun.

Son: I don’t think it’s a sun hat Daddy. I think it’s his sad hat.

Me: Hmmm. You may well be right buddy…

#TMCAMTD – The BEST Letter

So he’s practicing his writing at the moment. This is the best way to get him to remember what’s what. It also makes his letter appear to be the BEST letter of the alphabet. It’s definitely one of the best 26.